Thursday, October 16, 2008

To Continue My "Freakmagnet" Theme...

I had a yummy lunch today with my friend Brande. We went for Indian food and though the service was a little slow for some reason, the food was good and we got to catch up. Brande is busy as hell lately because she's working on the No on Prop. 8 campaign. If you want to help out, please click that link or email brande at

Anyway, she's very busy so we caught up at lunch and she had to leave before our super slow waiter came with the check. I've been to this restaurant a few times. He is new, or new-ish, because I hadn't seen him before. He saw me alone at the table and I had my hand to my mouth. My finger was on my lip because my lips are dry. "Mental note: lip balm at CVS on the way home," is what I was thinking. But he mimicked my gesture and said, in a fairly thick Indian accent, "No. you shouldn't bite your fingers." I just sat there kind of perplexed and stunned when he said it, so he continued: "Do you know what psychologists say about people who bite their fingers? That they were not fed enough as babies."


Here's the texted conversation between me and Brande after the incident:

Me: Dude, the waiter just told me not to bite my finger. And then he said that in psychology, biting your fingers is a sign you were not fed enough as a baby!

Brande: Tell him it was a psychological reaction to waiting a thousand hours for our check.

Me: Do you think he was trying to tell me I'm fat?

Brande: I think it was that you are underfed. Or it was a weird pickup line.

For the record, I waddled over to the buffet line twice, and when he offered Diet Coke, I said Regular. There's no way the guy thinks I'm underfed.

Someone mocked me to my face and then said "no."

My life. In a nutshell.

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